I am an Arilou LaLee’lay

Switching gears a little bit, I am pleased to report that I am an officially registered member of the Black Spathi Squad (as a duly recognized representative of the Arilou LaLee’Lay race). Frankly, I have no idea what any of this means, but whenever a website offers to let me register myself using the name JeffoWup, I jump at the chance. Apparently I’m allowed to put draw a badass picture of an Arilou and place it on my site now, which I’m afraid isn’t very likely in actual reality.

For those who don’t know what I’m talking about (poor, ugly souls), this is all in reference to the Star Control videogame universe. Here are a couple of fun links to get you up to speed:

A ridiculously complete starcon site

About the Arilou (ie. Me)

View the BSS manifest

About the BSS

www.peasej.com

I’ve made some changes to my home page (which can now be reached at www.peasej.com). The content is more or less identical to the old one, but it is in a somewhat sexier format. You’ll also notice the large, yellow text area. This area is basically a place in which I can be completely random (which, let’s face it, is something of a compulsion of mine) without feeling too guilty about it. I feel no particular obligation to keep this fresh or exciting or anything (unlike this fine site).

It should also be noted that my home page will likely be completely useless to everyone but me, but I just wanted to throw it out there for the sake of completeness.

That is all.

I’m out $60.

C.P. Direct, the company responsible for the dubious dong-expanding “Longitude” pill, has been shut down by Arizona authorities. Among the assests seized were $20 million in bank accounts, $3 million in cash, and a couple of supercars (including the Lamborghini that they keep trying to give away in Maxim, to the fellow with the most impressive growth).

ABC News

Classmates.com

I tried Classmates.com the other day to see what sorts of sexy personal information I could find on my former classmates. The service doesn’t actually let you see who’s registered unless you first enter your information, and even then doesn’t actually let you use your classmates info unless you pay the company $36 (which is something I’m reasonably sure I don’t want to be a part of).

Naturally, I logged in using a fake name and info (which will no doubt add yet another layer to the intrigue of the Neil Dennis legend). I frankly can’t imagine why anybody would voluntarily sign up for something like this, but I was surprised to see that, lo and behold, a bunch of people have. And I’m reasonably sure that it was not some sort of massive hack into high school databases by the evil geniuses at Classmates.com, since my name wasn’t listed (and I graduated, dammit).

All of my old classmates should do the reasonable, responsible thing and opt out of this stupid Classmates.com deal and just start up their own websites. We were a Math Science Computer magnet school, ferchrissake…

Pre-plucked yardbirds

Here’s a great story about a genetically modified chicken which has no feathers. This is good because feathers are a fantastic natural insulator and cause chickens to overheat in warmer climates. It is expected that the new breed of chicken will take well to these areas, will produce less by-product (in the form of all those damn feathers), will be easier to process since it won’t need to be plucked, and will be a lower fat bird as well.

Of note are the quotes from the opposition to the project. Read on for more on these morons.
Continue reading “Pre-plucked yardbirds”

Used Cars becomes reality

I’m sure you are all intimately familiar with the plot of the fabulous Zemeckis/Spielberg vehicle (ha ha) Used Cars… Remember the video manipulation dastardly car salesman Roy L. Fuchs used to incite the massive-scale third act, where hundreds of junker cars sold to the good guys by El Guapo power across the desert to make it to the lot in time for the official measuring by Grandpa Al Lewis?

Well, thanks to the good people at the MIT Media Lab, such a nightmarish control of the video media has now become reality. In Used Cars II, Roy L. will be unstoppable, and if you know a Roy L. in real life, your days are numbered, mister. God Help Us All.

News and Notes from around the web

First up is The Onion. Sorry, Dan, but it appears that burglary, not mockery, is the sincerest form of flattery.

www.zzz.ru is a funky tech enthusiast page I visit every so often. They’ve got a very interesting story headlining this week’s issue. In summary, AeroVironment is a company trying to fix the problems associated with the required infrastructure of both wired and wireless net access by building transmitter tower hardware into one of their bad-ass Helios aircraft. You’ve probably seen Helios on the news or something; it’s the solar powered, remote-controlled flying wing that can–in theory–stay in the air for months at a time.

Something about a pack of these things gliding over America running wireless communications seems really cool to me. As major localized events (Super Bowl, conventions, etc) happen some guy could send fleets of these things flying over them to allow for additional data transfer, and it could very well be quite cheap to set these planes aloft and maintain them rather than buying land for and building a bunch of transmitter towers or laying miles upon miles of copper.

Then I get these ideas about America becoming completely dependent on them for telecom, and then some crazy bastard gets in the control room and crashes them all, leaving the country networkless. *shudder*

Luckily, according to UPI, we should soon be able to guard such critical installations with weapons that fire in excess of one million rounds per minute… jesus.

Shlonglor is in fine form today

Two bits from Shlonglor’s site today.

First of all, I don’t know if this is common knowledge for those of you who are Buffy fans or not, but next season will apparently be the last one,at least according to the dork that plays Xander. About time, if you ask me; I watched the double-meat episode with the old lady who was a killer thingy, and god, that sucked.

If you’ve hung around the internet for any length of time, you’ve probably heard of Petition Online, one of the biggest wastes of time on the Internet. A petition with real live signatures is virtually meaningless to most movers and shakers; it’s tough to verify, the numbers rarely amount to anything but a tiny, vocal minority, and the people making the decisions usually have what they consider solid reasoning and won’t likely be swayed by a few signatures. That said, there is something more useless than paper petitions: electronic petitions, where email addresses shift like the sands and a script kidding with a rudimentary understanding of the Turing test could construct a process to fill out these petitions with all manner of random names, addresses, and comments.

That’s why this petition is so cool.

New computer nearing completion

I love it when a plan comes together. Yesterday, I procured most of the parts for my new computer, and the rest are supposed to be delivered within hours. By tonight, I may have a complete computer system all set up and ready to go. I did make some changes from my initial specs… read on for the details.
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Jeff’s Coolness Rating Jumps a Notch

That’s right kids: you thought I couldn’t get any cooler, but now I have. A guy at KSDT (Thanks Andrew!) just gave me his old Nintendo, Genesis, and Super Nintendo, with an Intellivision and an Atari said to be just around the corner. Combine that with Dave’s 3DO and my PS2, and I am going to be a veritable video gaming superpower. You are like the buzzing of flies to me.
Continue reading “Jeff’s Coolness Rating Jumps a Notch”

Scientists Invent Remote Controlled Rat

Independent News

This story is everywhere at the moment. I can’t help but think that this is all very clever, and, at the same time, very hilarious. Aside from remote controlled rats being used to rescue people caught in collapses and find landmines, I totally think they would make a great gift – kind of like an Aibo that messes.

This technology would work great in other animals as well – cats, dogs, small children, etc. With something like this, getting the kids to mow the lawn and stay off to pot will be a cinch.